A dream to remember...

I will refrain in the future from sharing some of the stranger dreams I have as they might scare even the most open minded of people, but this one stands out.  Those that do not know I am a big dreamer, sometimes multiple per night.  Very rarely do they make sense even to me, but last night's dream seemed to be a positive omen despite its nonsensical approach.  My subconscious works in strange ways; sometimes reminding me that things are going to be alright despite my reservations.  OK, here goes:

A handful of customers come into the store to surprise me with a closing gift.  They have commissioned a local artist to do an oil painting of the store with me in it.  As the artist sets up his easel (the artist resembling a friend of a friend on FB by the name of 'Pops') customers from over the years file into the store and say their goodbyes.  Amongst the tears and reminiscing a handful of customers approach me and start to disrobe me.  Someone is standing in front of me with a giant fig leaf prepared to cover my genitals.

I then am instructed to do my best Rodin's The Thinker pose while sitting on a stack of comics about two feet high.  All the customers disappeared at some point to leave me to my pose for the artist.  While holding the pose for what seems like hours, 'Pops' berates me every time I move and keeps saying he has to start over.  I am constantly shifting because I can feel the cover of the comic on the top of the stack sticking to my bare buttocks. 

People occasionally wander in to see the artist at work, laughing and snickering at me in my naked state.  At one point John Layman and Mark Rahner, two friends of mine prominent in the comic industry wander in drunk and vomit on Pops back, apparently disgusted by my nudity.  'Pops' continues to work, using a strange palate of colors all seeming to represent colors I don't recall being prominent in the storefront.  Not to mention all sparkly. 

I notice 'Pops' digging at his ear like he has a bad ear infection.  He digs out a Ziploc bag of glitter dust.  I start to protest as I have become a hater of glitter in all of its forms.  'Pops' opens the bag, winds up like a pitcher, and throws the bag of dust on the canvas, knocking both the canvas and easel to the floor.  He then bows to me, tips his hat, and walks out the door.

I remained in my Thinker pose for a minute before I realize he isn't coming back.  I put on a pair of underwear and go over to lift the face-down canvas from the floor.  The picture is of my girlfriend and I standing in front of my car at the Grand Canyon with an unusually large smile.

I got dressed, set the alarm, and closed the door to the shop, and got in my car and drove off.

I find a lot of personal insight in this dream.  Thank you Captain Subconscious for making my day.

Why "Sluggo"?

The name Sluggo was given to me in the year 6010 by the ancient and honorable order of E Clampus Vitus.  Certain trials and tests were put upon me in a secretive initiation.  Upon completion the name was given to me as a token of respect by my brothers in the organization.

At first I took this name to be a hinderance: the assumption is if you have a nickname with 'Slug' in it you are a lethargic, slow, perhaps dimwitted fellow...perhaps even leaving a slime trail in my path. 

All facts aside, I now hold the name in extreme high regard.  Many good nicknames throughout history are not reflective of a person's demeanor or personal stature, but are exactly the opposite.  This is how I see this name and will continue to use it in that capacity.

What is E Clampus Vitus?  The organization is dedicated to the preservation of Western heritage and historical preservation and remembrance.  I joined this organization out of a deep and passionate love for this world and the mysteries within it.  Next time you stumble through a cemetery and notice a beautifully restored headstone it was probably done by us.  If you saunter into an old building with a historical significance you may note a plaque commemorating the building.  Yep, us again. 

Our local Chapter of E Clampus Vitus, the Doc Maynard Chapter, is taking great steps to take the organization to the next level and make it a household name.  If you have heard of the organization, you probably have heard mostly derogatory references to drunkards, red shirts, out and out rowdy folks crowding local bars with one thing on their mind: excessive liquor comsumption.  OK, not a stretch but there is so much more to the organization that keeps me active in its ranks.


Those that know me know I am not a big drinker, but dammit when I do it I do it right!  The rest of the year and my dedication to the order is in the capacity of historical preservation.  We have some  wonderful plans coming up this year that should take the world by storm.  Stay tuned for updates!

Want to be a 'Clamper'?  You have to be invited.  Talk to us.